Being Iron Man never brought joy to Tony Stark. Alcoholism, financial ruin, lady trouble–these are just some of the indignities he’s had to endure. Never mind an occasional pummeling from the Hulk.

So why was the U.S. government trying to build a real-life Iron Man? Sure they call the project Exoskeletons for Human Performance Augmentation (EHPA), but look at the requirements: this thing must augment human strength and enable the wearer to leap extraordinary heights or distances. The price for this boondoggle, fellow taxpayers: $50 million.

The EHPA site hasn’t been updated for awhile. Maybe the government wised up and transferred those funds to its gamma bomb project.

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